Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Queer Clear!

Remember how you all love hearing about my dating life? (Too bad if you don't!) So my uncle called me on Sunday with the usual, "I know a guy, he's great, he's tall, my daughter says he's good looking, etc etc etc, oh, and he's about 30 and never kissed a girl."

Can we say red flags here? Giant, huge ones that scream, "He's got issues!"

But since I'm single and I at least trust my uncle not to set me up with a creep-o, I say ok. And then I immediately call my cousin to see if she can give me the scoop on him. She didn't know too much, but said she'd get back to me. I promptly did some facebook stalking. Found him. Nothing huge to report.

Until the next day when cousin and I text:

Cousin: "Found him on facebook. I have a couple of friends that know him pretty well so I am waiting to hear."
Me: "I forgot to tell you that uncle told me he's never kissed a girl. Woof and weird!"
Cousin: "That explains why I think I heard he has struggled with same sex attraction. I am waiting for confirmation. I would queer clear though."
Cousin (again): "Ha ha! I meant steer. That was hilarious!" (You know how when you text it just brings up the word for you automatically? Apparently "steer" and "queer" share text words.)

So after I go out with the gay guy I'm pretty sure I've done it all. Can I be done yet? :)

4 comments:

Unknown said...

oh Alicia! HAHAHAHAHA!!! you are so amazing and funny :) Way to have a great attitude :)

Crystal said...

Yes. Bless you Alicia for this. Something amazing is coming, that's all I have to say.

Amber Marie said...

that is one of the funniest stories i've heard in a loong time.

but seriously, i have a guy for you too. i'm just waiting to find out if he's in a relationship...this one is definitely not gay!

A Painted Diary said...

please go out with him. I want to hear the story. :)

I miss you all so much.